Kensley

I have no clue where that fast tail sister of mine is. I called her all night long at home and on her cell. Normally I wouldn't even bother trying to get into her business, but I know that when she has something stupid on the brain I am the only one who can save her. McKenzie was M.I.A as well so no doubt she knows everything that is going on. Kayleigh can't move unless she has Kenzie by her side. I could barely make love to Eric last night because she kept popping in my brain. He could tell that I was barely there so he ended it quickly. Which only opened up the conversation for my "stiffness" as he calls it. I know I know, I am his wife, it is my duty, and all that other great stuff. However, I can live without it. I've tried but I can't find any good in sex. We already have our boy and girl so I don't see the purpose of carrying on the charade of sex any further. Of course Eric sees it a different way but he'll get over it, he always does.

"You know I love you Kensley but I don't see how I can go on like this."

Eric's deep voice walking into the bathroom scared me in the shower almost causing me to fall.

"Eric what are you doing in here? I'm naked for God's sake."

"Try being naked for my sake Kensley. What is the world coming to when a man can't see his wife naked. I love you and I want to be here for you. But this lack of intimacy is killing me, I thought that once we were married you would open up more. After the kids I knew that you were in it for the long haul, but why won't you open up to me. Why am I paying for another man's mistakes?"

It was obvious that he wasn't leaving the bathroom so I grabbed the nearest towel and covered up.

"I'm loosing my mind and you don't even care. The scheduled twice a week sex sessions, the way you go into a far away land during, and how I can't even explore different ways with you. When was the last time you told your kids that you loved them. Hell when was the last time you told me?"

"I don't want to discuss this Eric I don't know what you are talking about. I do know how to love. I love Kaleigh, I love the kids, and I love you."

"Last, you love me last Kensley. Your sister is a grown woman now, but we are your family now. You should love us first and foremost."

"Don't bring my sister up she has nothing to do with this. She's a kid that I don't want to make the same mistakes as I."

"She's almost thirty damn-it, she is grown. Be concerned about your own kids like that. Worry about how long this marriage will last. Let me in please, I am begging you for the sake of us, to just let me in."

He jumped in the shower fully clothed holding me in the tightest embrace. I could feel his hands rubbing the small of my back, before I knew it he was pushing my towel over my hips. I love Eric and I need his love but men are all the same and I can't take that pain again. I just can't.

"Eric please just leave I have to get dressed and go find Kaleigh." I grabbed the face towel and began to apply soap, anything so I didn't have to look in his eyes.

"You're making the biggest mistake ever Kensley, I don't want to prove your theory right, but I am this close to walking out that door and never coming back."

That got my attention and we stared at each other and I could tell that he was waiting on my response. I wanted to ask him to be patient and please don't leave. I didn't know how to say it. No other words were spoken as he stepped out and walked away defeated.